Insomnia

I'm not one to suffer from insomnia. Usually. In fact, I can sleep some 20 hours a day if I need (want?) to. Well, that particular rule is out the window. Here is a bulleted list of the potential reasons that I can't (bad word) sleep at night:

• The job market
• The fact that after looking for over a year, all I can find are low-paying, short-term jobs
• My law degree, which cost $100,000 and is worth about $10/hour. I made more before law school.
• Planning my wedding
• Paying for my wedding
• Guilt over the fact that Rex makes money, but absolutely hates his job. I get to stay at home all day.
• Staying at home all day, feeling like a total loser.
• Rent, which apparently has to be paid every month. We don't make enough to pay it every month!
• Medical bills. A few thousand worth.
• Medical billing companies that have no sympathy for the unemployed.
  
• The fact that I'm not actually applying for jobs full time. That's what they tell you to do. What they don't tell you is that (a) there aren't enough jobs to take up that much time applying (b) after a while, it's hard to motivate because it feels so futile.
• Basically? It all comes down to money. You need it for EVERYTHING, but we really don't have any. I have $76 in my bank account, which is great when you don't have a job and therefore don't have more coming in.
  

I'm so stressed out!

The Impending Bar Exam

The goddamned bar exam is the only thing I can think about, so it's the perennial subject of this blog and everything else out of my mouth/mind, and will be until it's over.
The thing is the DAY AFTER TOMORROW, and the panic abated for the last week or so, but really? This is terrifying. Because if I don't pass, I have to wait another 6 months and pay another $600, and in the meantime I won't get licensed and it will be even harder to find work. Which, as it turns out, isn't exactly the easiest thing in the world right now as it is. Can you read the edge in my voice? Because it's there, with a little shakiness. And still, I'm too burned out to study any more. Which only freaks me out more. It's a vicious cycle, I tell you.
I am, however, looking forward to staying at the Hotel Teatro during the exam. And eating at alto the night between exam days. I've never been to either of the places before, but they look amazing on the websites, and are really close to the Convention Center where the bar exam is to be held. I figured I could pamper myself (and Rex), given that this is probably the most stressful thing I'll ever do. At least until I have (if I have) kids.
I'm off to see if I can't force a few more minutes of mnemonic device learning into my head. PATERNITY, KIDBARF, CAMPingMAP, ALIE, SID to the REC, HEDDEC, HOACS, RVCABLEFAILS, this sucks ass. And I only know what a few of those even stand for.

Busy times

In the last month, I graduated from law school, went to Crested Butte and Texas (spraining my ankle and tearing ligaments in between trips), moved, started a new job, and started studying for the bar. Bar review really, really sucks. What with trying to get accustomed to the new job and get moved in, plus that nagging wedding planning business, bar review, which should be a full-time affair, really isn't even close. Eight hours a week is a surefire way to fail. But studying for the thing sucks way more than law school did. I need: (A) more time in a day; (B) more weeks in January; and (C) the bar exam to be anytime good and later than the end of February. That's not too much to ask, is it?

Oh, and I went snowboarding this morning. My still-not-totally-healed ankle wasn't really thrilled, especially after Jazzercise yesterday. But it was such a beautiful day, I couldn't resist!

Under the Dome

So I've been hard at work for a few days now, really about a week. Having to get up at 6:30 to go to work really sucks, but my job as a legislative aide is interesting.

Except on Monday. The 40 minute commute took nearly three hours because of an unexpected storm, a commute in which I had to stand up on the bus on my sprained ankle (and yes, it's STILL screwed up). We finally got off the bus at an early stop to walk the rest of the way because of the horrid slowness of the traffic. Then Starbucks got my drink SO WRONG (I ordered a cappuccino, it's not rocket science) and I was so cranky that I threw it on the ground because I didn't realize it was wrong until we were away from the store. Rex was kind enough to buy me a new one at the next Starbucks, but then when I got to work the phone rang immediately and I was stuck talking to crazy constituents for the next two hours. One lady took up a whole hour on her own. The rest of the day was good, including the commute home, until we were in the parking lot at the bus station and I slipped on black ice and landed right on my ass. Which was also not so bad until Rex slipped right after me and his leg went right into my back. I burst into tears for a minute, then we were laughing, and then we had wine. Lots and lots of wine, for purposes of curing the Monday-from-hell-ness.

Yesterday and today have been much better.

Looking...this time for a new place to live

After the job search that would never end (really it's just suspended, and I'll work for $10/hour part-time in the mean time), I'm now on to the next search--this time for a new place to call home. We had to terminate the contract on our condo for a whole host of reasons, but I CANNOT live in a crappy apartment with no dishwasher, a/c, washer/dryer, or closet space any longer. Our pantry and our linen closet and our storage closet are the same thing. One closet, about 18" wide and 24" deep, has to fit food, cleaning supplies, and miscellany. There is one drawer in the kitchen. It holds our silverware. Everything else goes on the countertop. The only counter space is occupied by the dish dry rack, so you have to move that to cook. The sink isn't divided, so you can't dry dishes on one side of the sink instead. It gets to be around 95 degrees in the summer months. The bathroom is through the kitchen, which means from the bedroom you cross past the front door, the living room, and through the kitchen to get there. Given that I'm about to have a JD, I think I'm ready for more commitment. Like with a dishwasher. I lust after dishwashers, to the point that people who have them think I'm going to sexually assault theirs. Wish me luck, and look out, dishwashers of Boulder.

Miss Grace: Remember Pardall? I think this is more poorly equipped. Even when you consider the neighbors and that eensy shower.

On why I hate Career Development...

I am going to a career fair at the law school tonight. There are numerous employers collecting applications. So I have been diligently drafting cover letters, in the hopes that I might find a job tonight. Since there are two separate lists of employers attendees, one entitled "employers collecting applications," the other titled "employers participating," I had assumed that there would be at least the possibility of job openings.

I was wrong.

I just ran into my illustrious career counselor, one of those in charge of the event. I said to him, "E---, I hope there are going to be some jobs for real lawyers/graduates tonight!" His response? "Oh, don't go looking for jobs, just collect information."

SO WHY DO I HAVE TO WRITE COVER LETTERS??? Why are applications being accepted if there are no jobs? AND HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO ACTUALLY GET A JOB??? Information doesn't exactly get the job done. It's called a career fair for a reason.

Yet another medical saga, and insurance

Sometimes I think I might be a hypochondriac, because it seems like I have more weird and somewhat serious medical issues crop up than other people I know. I use my self-awareness of this to tell myself that it's all real, and that I'm not a hypochondriac, rather I'm just not the healthiest girl. Which would stand to reason if you knew about my lifestyle.

It all started in college, with "the gremlin." Somewhat suddenly, I was throwing up just about everything I ate. Wednesday night pizza and beer at Woodstock's in Isla Vista was particularly egregious, and there was a tree I would always duck behind on the walk home to retch. It became so commonplace, I didn't even blink. Well, the condition of my tummy got so bad that a roommate demanded I go to the emergency room. At the time, I was in so much pain I couldn't stand up all the way. She was probably right about the need to seek treatment, but I tend to avoid doctors like the plague (see, I told you I'm not a hypochondriac). After a little morphine, I felt all better. After six months of no alcohol or greasy food, the gremlin had been healed considerably. It has never totally gone away, though. Mostly I just ignore it now, except fo those times it hurts so badly I just moan and try to go to sleep.

Last year, in May, my right calf went numb. Then my thigh. Then, as the feeling would come back at the lower end of this numbness, the feeling would move higher. A numb half-belly feels really weird. Rex's dad is an MD, so a phone call to him revealed that this could be nothing normal or ok. Again, I protested a trip to the ER in a way that you might have thought Rex was trying to remove my fingernails with rusty pliers. Until the right half of my tongue went numb. It's hard to be convincing if you sound like a drunk retard. To the ER we went. I got scared enough by the time we were checking in with the triage nurse and my speech center went wonky. In the exam room, I lost the ability to speak certain sounds, "thank you" would come out only as "yank you," no matter how hard I tried. It looked like a stroke, and a trip to the ER was probably well-advised.

It wasn't a stroke, just an "aura migraine," unusual only for the severity of the aura symptoms. Auras usually present as mild visual disturbances, and they'd never seen anything quite like mine. So they sent me for a CT scan and an MRI, plus trips to the neurologist. Two grand later, I was pronounced just fine. That two grand, however, will haunt me for around five years, because that's how long it will take me to pay it off at $30 a month, which is still more than I can afford.

Don't you have insurance?, I hear you asking. Well, yes'm I do. With a $3000 deductible. That renews each year. I have zero coverage until I meet the deductible, be it for perscription drugs, office visits, or something that looks like a stroke. So the two grand falls entirely on me to pay. This is the kind of insurance someone like me can afford (actually, my dad pays for it. I would be uninsured if he didn't. And it ain't cheap).

Two things just converged that caused me to write this rather long diatribe. One, as you might have guessed from the title, is that something else has gone awry with little Parepare. The other is the revelation from a New York Times article that women are paying more for health insurance than men. And the reasons are not entirely clear. This more expensive coverage does not include maternity care, which would at least account for the disparity. Anthem, my insurer, is listed as being one of the major offenders. Women with Anthem in Columbus OH (the example cited) pay 49% more than men in the same age group, and the disparities are worse for young women. Being a young woman who is barely insured, and at that can't afford health care, this makes me so mad really I'm just disappointed. Because really, are we surprised? No. We know that the system is totally f***ed. But this should be illegal. We can't discriminate based on race, but sex? Sure, go right ahead. That's progress.

So, in the shadow of this knowledge, I just made an appointment for a breast core biopsy, because I have a fibroadenoma in my right breast. A fibroadenoma is a lump very common in young women (particularly my age bracket) that is almost always benign. So it's really just a lump that's more annoying than anything. But because of the severity of cancer, since there is a remote chance that the lump is cancerous, fibroadenomas are nearly always biopsied or removed. Mine shall be biopsied in a procedure that will have me out of commission for 24 hours, and guess what? I get to pay for it all with the riches I have from being a law student for 2 1/2 years. My insurance does not cover this sort of treatment (though the guy at Anthem enthusiastically told me that they cover 100% once I reach the deductible!). I chose the less expensive biopsy option, which will mean I'll still have the lump. But I'll know it's a nothing lump. And I'll get to remember that fact every month when I get the bill, asking for another $30. I just hope they don't raise my monthly payments with addition of the new charges. That would really hurt.

Wolf Law, 207

Room 207 in the Wolf Law Building is perpetually FREEZING. And there's a vent over my head that blows frigid air on me the whole time I sit here. Green building? I think not. It's not warm outside, folks, we don't need the A/C on full blast. Now I shall stop typing because I have 10 finger popsicles.

Just got back

Just got back from Texas. Partied myself REALLY sick at Austin City Limits Festival. It was SO SO SO awesome. Maybe I'll have some time for recapping, but probably not. Have a meeting tomorrow regarding all the work I've done on a BLM project. Except that I've not done a SINGLE thing yet. Get to be sick AND up all night. Yay!

Wasting my time....

Just had a job interview. They said, "your resume is very appealing," and sounded ready to offer me a job on the spot. For a job that I actually want. Then, I ask about salary. The job is unpaid. Thanks for your time, judges. On to the next thing. Maybe someone will decide one day that my law degree makes me deserving of a paycheck (however paltry, I'll take just about anything at this point).

Status update?

Since I'm still out of a job (and in my last week at my unpaid position with EPA), I figured I better find SOMETHING to do with my time, so I decided to volunteer. I already do tours for the law school, but this week I agreed to serve as a bailiff for a capital murder trial. In Centennial. Almost 50 miles away. So I will be commuting almost 100 miles round trip to escort jurors to and from the courtroom. At least I'm a good citizen?

More whining

I know you’re sick of hearing me whine about not having a job, but that’s all I got going right now.

Currently: I am paying $20/hour to work (yes, that’s the reverse of how it’s supposed to be). I go to the law school, the one to which I pay ever-increasing tuition plus $20/hour for my job at EPA, in order to search for jobs. However, lately the internet rarely works at the law school that is causing my debt to balloon, so I can’t even use the career development website or use other online resources in my job search. Might I point out that everything is on the internet these days, which is why I take the time to come to the school for my job search—so that I can use the magical World Wide Web. Which is so much less magical when it only contains the page “Problem loading page.” I can’t even check my damned email, and I would be screaming at the top of my lungs were I not in the library with someone working at the table behind me.

Note: I’m writing this in a Word document, because I can’t get online. No email, no blogging, and no productivity. I might cry, because it’s costing me a fortune to do nothing. No income = big financial problems (for very obvious reasons).

Some fun math

An idea of my monthly expenses:
Rent: $1100 (for both me and Rex)
Car Insurance: $80
Energy Bill: $75
Gas: ...
Food: ...

My monthly income (combined, with Rex's): $0

Someone please tell me: how does this work?

Yes, I have student loans. No, they do not cover the cost of living. Plus it's summer, where they are particularly paltry (read: gone by July 1).

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I need a job! The thing is, employers expect law students to work for free, which presents a problem that would have been nice to know about before going to law school: you have to be wealthy to attend, otherwise you will be poorer than before you began. I thought I would go to law school to make more money than my pitiful post-college job paid, but it turns out that I am making less. A lot less. So much for that bright idea.

My Ethics Class is Bulls***, Conclusion

Remember the horrid ethics class? If not, you can look here and here and here. I just discovered (thanks to the wonder of public information) that the awful professor makes $174K per year. He's one of the highest paid professors at the law school. How? Why? Just like in corporate America, compensation in the higher education system does not reflect actual ability to perform one's job. Now I feel more ripped off than ever that I had to take that class from PW.

I HATE MY JOB

Let me just repeat, I HATE MY JOB. I used to love this job, it was awesome, I was very autonomous, it was flexible, and I felt appreciated. Now, I no longer have any autonomy, the flexibility has become rigid, and the appreciation evaporated. It's the group, not me, causing these things, so at least I know I'm not a total failure. A month ago, I was in charge of both our volunteers (15 of them) and our publications/printed materials. Now I'm doing internet research that a monkey could do. I did NOT come to law school to research S&P's 599, or the Dow Jones Industrial Average. I want to be an environmental lawyer, not a stock analyst. And yet... I really just want to cry I am so frustrated, because essentially these guys have totally screwed me, but I still have to give them my time. And I don't even get anything out of it, because I work for work study, which is money that I could just get as loans if I didn't have to sit here deciding what financial information I think should be a part of the interface that we use to analyze corporate pledges. I AM NOT A MONKEY, but I sure feel like one. Also, my total inability to stand up for myself and tell them that I don't really like being treated like a chimp (or chump, whatever you prefer) doesn't help.

Wouldn't you like to be me?

Another update on what I'm doing right now. You voyeur. I'm sitting at school (not in the library, that closes at 10), with my sunglasses on because my eyes hurt from the florescent lights and staring at my computer, drinking vodka and 7Up out of my coffee cup. I have been at school for 11 1/2 hours, and was here for 12 hours yesterday. This is what it's like to be in law school, I tell you. I don't even know what "outside" looks like anymore. I don't even leave to eat--Rex goes out for food and brings it back to me, and he feeds the cat, and does all those things I would do if I wasn't a law student. Or at least, if I wasn't a total nutjob.

I need a job

Two months ago I told my bosses that I would be graduating in December. Both indicated informally that they would very much like to hire me, and I know that I'm a favorite there. So, I figured I had a job post-graduation, especially since they didn't bother to get back to me more formally for two months, and everyone NEEDS A JOB. Today, boss #1 calls me into his office to say, "We can't afford to hire you when you graduate. But we really really like you and wish we could. Also, please do all of this sh** before the event tomorrow." I agreed to work for the place all summer on the assumption that I'D HAVE A JOB when I graduate. Because in the law world, the place you work in the summer is the place you usually work when you graduate, as they've tested you out. Now, I have a summer job and therefore can't get "tested" by another place that might actually hire me. Did I mention that I'll be graduating with a mortgage? That I have to pay each month? "Adam mentioned to us that he'd want to work here a year and a half ago." I didn't work for the place a year and a half ago, so how could I have mentioned it to them then that I would want to stay on after graduation?

Sometimes, I just can't like everyone

Most law students are hideously irritating people, so it should come as no surprise that I wanted to shove pencils in my ears this morning. There's this girl in my administrative law class, and I don't know her name, but I was sitting here thinking about how annoying she is and how much I detest her, when she began to speak. The following ensues:
Annoying girl (AG): The people at Starbucks always make fun of me for ordering child size drinks.
Me (interjecting, OBVIOUSLY not thinking): You could order a short, which is what they call it.
AG (suddenly very agitated): I DON'T THINK I SHOULD HAVE TO LEARN A NEW VOCABULARY TO ORDER A DRINK AT STARBUCKS, AND I THINK IT'S UNREASONABLE OF THEM TO EXPECT ME TO.
Me (trying to calm down the crazy): Oh, well, 8 ounces is a traditional size for a cup of coffee (?).
And in my head: Holy god woman, if you hate it so much, why do you go there enough to know a guy who "always" makes fun of you for ordering child size? You don't have to like Starbucks and you certainly don't have to go there, they sell coffee lots of places. And you exaggerated by saying "the people at Starbucks always make fun of me" because you then gave away that it's one guy. Anyway, my strategy for dealing with places that I really don't like is to NOT GO THERE, if I can help it. And there is a coffee shop INSIDE THIS BUILDING, and it's not Starbucks. Like they say in the law, vote with your feet (and leave).

My Ethics Class is Bulls***, Part I

I say Part I because I am sure that I will have MANY more gems to share with you over the semester, if I bother to take the time. I know this is long, but you should read it because it is total, utter trash. I had to read it for class. But then we talked about substance abuse during class.
1. Question: How much money does it take to be happy?

Answer: It takes about $40,000. It does not matter how many kids you have or what city you live in—that’s splitting hairs because peoples’ happiness levels are largely based on their level of optimism and the quality of their relationships. So as long as you have enough money for food and shelter, your optimism level kicks in to dictate how happy you are.

EDITOR'S NOTE: This point is ok, and I agree with it to the extent that a family could be supported with $40k/year.

2. Question: Is it more important to be competent or likable?

Answer: People would actually rather work with someone who is incompetent and likeable than competent and unlikable. Most people nod in agreement when they read this. It’s the unlikable people who form arguments in their head.

But there’s more. At work, if you are unlikable, people start thinking you are less competent. So stop thinking you can skate by on your genius IQ because you can’t. You need emotional intelligence as well. This situation is so pronounced that there are special-education classrooms rife with kids who could read when they were three. Social skills matter as much as intelligence when it comes to long-term success, even for the geniuses.

EDITOR'S NOTE: I have had to work with incompetent people, and it is one of THE most frustrating thing. How about we don't reward incompetence?

3. Question: Should I sue a boss who is sexually harassing me?

Answer: In most cases, you will destroy your career if you report sexual harassment. So unless you are in physical danger, you should not report harassment. The laws governing sexual harassment don’t protect women who report. The law protects companies from being sued by the women who report. Human resource professionals are trained to protect the company, not the woman who reports.

When you report harassment it is usually the case that you lose your job through retaliation. Retaliation is illegal but nearly impossible to prove in court. And, even if you could prove it in court, you would go through emotional hell, with no salary, and high-profile drama that makes you unable to get another job. All this for a settlement that will almost certainly not enable you to retire.

This is simply how the legal system works. I am not saying this is okay. But I’m saying that if you care about your career, you’ll do everything possible to not report. Most women are not in the position to sacrifice their career—and their earning power—in the name of trying to bring down one harasser. The legal system needs to step in and take care of this.

EDITOR'S NOTE: My ETHICS professor is telling us that we shouldn't sue somebody for doing something ILLEGAL. Turn a blind eye? Isn't that UNETHICAL? I know it's at least amoral.

4. Question: When should I ask for a promotion?

Answer: Maybe never. The average salary increase is four percent. Is that going to change your life in any meaningful way? On top of that, someone is promoting you up their ladder, but their ladder is not necessarily your best path. So stay focused on where you want to go instead of the paths other people have created for you.

Getting a promotion is so last century. Instead of letting last century’s carrots dictate your workplace rewards, figure out what will be really meaningful to you: training, mentoring, flex time, whatever it is that means more than four percent more money. These are all things that can really improve your life and your career.

EDITOR'S NOTE: I just got a 25% raise, and let me tell you, it means more to me than, say, mentoring. Or training. I can train myself at my new, higher, hourly wage.

5. Question: Is being a generalist or a specialist the path to the executive suite?

Answer: In Hollywood, the best way to get your pick of any role in the industry is to become a specialist—funny guy, tough girl, action hero—get known for being the best at something, and then use that star-power to branch out. The same is true in business.

Jobs that don’t require a specialty are low level. To move up you need to be great at something, and you have to let people know what you don’t do. No one is great at everything. Even if your goal is not to get to the executive suite, you should specialize. When you want to take five months off to hike in Tibet, if you are easily replaced, you will be. If you have a skill that is hard to duplicate, your job will be there for you when you get back.

EDITOR'S NOTE: I have no comment.

6. Question: What do I do about the gaps in my resume when I traveled or couldn’t find a job?

Answer: Talk about them well. A gap is really bad if you spent your days on your sofa watching cartoons. But if you watched cartoons to prepare for your next career move into children’s programming, then you sound focused and driven. Same TV, same sofa, two different stories.

People don’t want to hear your life story. This is good news for people with sofa stints. In almost all cases, you learn something during a gap. Tell a great story about what you’ve learned and where you’re going, and your gap won’t get center stage. Leaving out details is not about lying; it’s about telling good stories.

EDITOR'S NOTE: This, again, seems amoral at best. It's at least not the kind of thing I think my ethics teachers should be forcing on me.

7. Question: Will getting an MBA or any other type of advanced degree be a good use of time and money since I can’t find a job?

Answer: No. If you can’t find a job, then you should invest in something like better grooming, or a better resume, or a coach for poor social skills. These are the things that keep people from getting jobs. Instead of running back to school, figure out why you can’t get a job, because maybe it’s something that a degree can’t overcome.

Grad school generally makes you less employable, not more employable. For example, people who get a graduate degree in the humanities would have had a better chance of surviving the Titanic than getting a tenured teaching job.

Unless you are going to a top business school at the beginning of your career, you should not stop working in order to get the degree. Go to night school because you will not make up for the loss of income with the extra credential.

Law school is one of the only graduate degrees that makes you more employable. Unfortunately it makes you more employable in the profession where people are more unhappy. Law school rewards perfectionism, and perfectionism is a risk factor for depression. Lawyers have little control over their work and hours, because they are at the beck-and-call of their clients, and many are constantly working with clients who have problems lawyers cannot solve. These two traits in a job—lack of control over workload and compromised ability to reach stated goals—are the two biggest causes for burnout in jobs.

[May I interject here? I went to law school for two weeks and quit when I was young! Guy]

EDITOR'S NOTE: So the only advanced degree that is worth anything is a law degree but that will make you utterly miserable. Well, that's just swell. I might add that I think many people with advanced degrees in, say, engineering, are better off with that degree than they would be without. Also, for anyone who has read Barbara Ehrenreich's Bait and Switch knows that she threw tons of money at the grooming etc. techniques mentioned in this point and it got her NOWHERE. It seems that my professor is telling all of us to quit. OH, the professor just said that a Coach is coming in on Thursday to tell us about that. How excellent.

8. Question: What’s the ideal length of a resume in a world where every resume is electronic and not viewed printed out on paper?

Answer: A page. Still. Your resume is a marketing document, not a summary of your life, so every line should be about an accomplishment. The more amazing your accomplishments, the fewer you need to list. For example, if you can write “Evangelized Macintosh and made it one of the most beloved brands in the world,” then you don’t need any other sales and marketing bullets on your resume.

If you have totally lost perspective, and you think you have two page’s worth of incredible and relevant achievements, consider that hiring managers spend ten seconds evaluating a resume, and a scanner looks for ten keywords, which certainly fit on one page.

So unless you have a great connection with the hiring manager, and you know he’ll look at both pages, don’t bother sending them. And if you do have that great connection then you are probably going to get an interview even if your resume sucks.

EDITOR: No comment.

9. Question: How should I prepare for an interview?

Answer: An interview is a test you can study for. So memorize answers to the fifty most common questions. Most interviewers ask standard variations on standard questions, and there are right answers to these questions.

Whether you are a stripper or a CIA agent, the answer to the question, “What is your weakness?” is a story about how your weakness interfered at work—in a specific situation—and you overcame it. Most of your other answers should be stories, too. This means you need to make them up before you get to the interview. Stories of your life are memorable. Lists of your life are not. Be memorable if you want to be hired.

Another way to prepare is to go to the gym right before the interview. It doesn’t matter if you never go to the gym—although you should, because people who workout regularly are more successful in their careers. You should go right before an interview because people judge you first on your appearance, and if do heavy lifting with your back and stomach muscles you will stand up much straighter in the interview. This will make you look more confident, which is half the battle in being judged by appearance.

EDITOR'S NOTE: WHAT?!?! I'm supposed to go to the gym and try to throw out my back (remember how they always tell you to lift with your legs, not with your back?) before an interview? Perfect, I'm sure the way to get a job is to call just before the interview and say, "sorry I can't make it, I threw out my back trying to have good posture during the interview I can't make it to."

10. Question: What’s the right strategy for the search for a first job out of college?

Answer: Don’t place too much importance on your first job. You’ll have a lot more. Most people have eight jobs before they turn thirty, and that’s fine. It is nearly impossible to know what career will be a good fit for you until you start trying things. So give yourself the latitude to try a lot. And don’t get hung up on a big soul search. To land a great job, you don’t need to know the meaning of life, just the meaning of hard work.

EDITOR'S NOTE: I agree with this one.

11. Question: Do only losers live at home after college?

Answer: On some level it would be insane not to move back home, which is why more than fifty percent of graduating seniors do it. Moving back to your parent’s house is a smart step toward finding a career that’s right for you.

Entry level jobs typically cannot cover the cost of rent, college loan payments, and insurance premiums—all of which are rising faster than wages. If you don’t have to worry about paying rent, you have more flexibility to wait for the right job and to take a job that feels very right but pays very poorly. The rise of the prestigious but unpaid internship intersects perfectly with trend to move back home.

EDITOR'S NOTE: I also agree with this one, but doesn't anyone else see the problem here? The elimination of the middle class? We need some big changes, and this little answer just reinforces the problem, rather than addressing it.

12. Question: What should I do if I work for a jerk?

Answer: Leave. I know there are classic Bob Sutton examples of revered jerks like Steve Jobs, but I wonder about the people who put up with him. Can they not find another visionary to work for who is not such a jerk?

Staying in a job like this makes you look bad. People wonder why you put up with it. And, frankly, you should too. It’s like being an abused wife. The wife who stays always defends the relationship by how much she gets out of it, but to everyone else it is obvious that she should leave. The problem is a loss of personal perspective.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Again, no comment except to say that the "visionary who is not a jerk" may not exist. But do you have to work for a visionary?

Here's somthing frustrating

My boss invited me to an event, for which I had to go buy a cocktail dress as I didn't own one. But apparently, we aren't going to the event, but he didn't think that it was important to tell me, so I've been going along as though I need to plan for a big fancy political event and will need to prepare to leave another event early (the latter event requires a great deal of my attention, so I have to make sure no crises will occur, which has already been a great expenditure of effort). At what point did he think it was ok not to tell me this, even though he's been emailing me all day about other stuff? He told the other invitee, my co-worker, and she told me, but why was it that he bothered to tell her and not me?

UPDATE: It turns out that the invitation may have been rescinded (from both myself and my co-worker) because a mistress was invited instead and the number of available slots was miscalculated. Pure hearsay at this point, but oooh it's juicy!